Maggie-ism's

Maggie has come up with some real doozies lately.

Tonight we came home and Captain had chewed a diaper (I know, disgusting) and Maggie says to me:

"Last year when I was a puppy, did I chew dirty diapers?"

I had know idea she used to be a dog. I tried to explain to her that she has never been a puppy, but she was pretty set that she had.

Andrew was coming over to play today and she says to me:

"Andrew is not a good share person."

I responded, "You are right, but neither are you."

And she says, "I know, I'm not."

Like she is perfectly okay with not being good at sharing.

I had a full sugar, full caffeine soda today (still trying to get rid of this headache), and I left it on the counter downstairs. When I came back down Maggie had drank the entire thing. All of it, not one sip left. I told her that she shouldn't drink my soda without asking and that she shouldn't drink that kind of soda because it is not for kids. And she says to me:

"It's okay mom, cause I a grown up."

Maggie is also very concerned over smells. She unfortunately got my sense of smell, which is very keen, and she mentions how bad things smell quite often.

I love it when she smells something horrible and says to me, "It smells like you." NICE

When my mom was here Maggie was sitting on her lap reading books with her. Maggie literally leapt off my mom's lap and onto mine (a couch away) and looks at my mom with the most disgusted look on her face and says, "I'm not reading with you, you smell." My mom and I both started to laugh. Captain was sitting on the floor in front of my mom and was apparently having some sort of digestive problems. Maggie's reaction was hysterical.

We can't go into any public bathroom without some comment from Maggie. And if she smells anything foul she asks, "Who pooped?"

My mom and Ruben have both been rudely reminded by Maggie that they have morning breath. On more than one occasion she has gotten into bed with them and proceeded to put her hand in front of their face and tell them, "Your nose smells." I guess that is where she thinks the stink comes from.

The best thing about all of these comments is the look on her face when she makes them. I wish I could get it on camera. It is like you or someone or something has done the most awful thing by making a smell. She scrunches up her nose, gets the most high and mighty look that she can muster and proceeds to be very rude. It cracks me up.

I promise I tell her that it isn't nice to tell people that they smell. But a little part of me smiles when she pipes up about a stench. Because most of the time I am thinking the same thing.